Why It’s Been a Little Quiet Here
A pause after my vacation — unplanned, but hopefully brief.
Dear friends
You haven’t heard from me for a little while following my return from vacation, so I wanted to explain why.
The bug I picked up a couple of weeks ago turned out to be Covid, and with MCAS that can mean a longer-than-normal tail. The worst of it has passed, but I’m left with deep fatigue and a brain that only comes into focus in flashes. This morning, after sixteen years in this house with my partner, I actually asked him where we keep the bread knife. And the troubling part was that it didn’t even feel like an unusual question to me. That earned me a very funny look, but it captures the fog I’m working through better than anything else could.
Right now, being unable to follow a thread means I’m struggling to write posts. Worse still, I also drift in and out of being able to take in written messages, so keeping up with emails — let alone reading other posts or news — is both challenging and frustrating. I simply don’t have the capacity for either at the moment. So if you’ve been in touch and not had a reply, please know I do see and appreciate it, and I will get back to you when I’m properly able. But for now, I need to allow things to be a little quieter here.
I’ll return to regular writing once my energy is back and the words come more easily — and I do intend to make up for the time I’ve missed. I hold myself to an average of two posts a week across forty-eight weeks of the year, and I don’t plan on stepping back from that commitment.
When I do return to regular writing, however, the posts themselves may look a little different, a little lighter — for a while, at least. Not lighter in terms of the message, but perhaps lighter in the depth of delivery. I know that cognitive fatigue and brain fog are not only side effects of illness but also a very real issue for anyone living under advancing authoritarianism. That narrowing of focus, that difficulty in sustaining attention — we’re all feeling it. So I'm thinking that perhaps a shift in pace would end up being useful to all of us.
In the meantime, thank you for your patience and for being here. Knowing that each of you will be waiting in this space when I’m ready to step back in is what makes all the difference.
In solidarity, as ever
— Lori
The only thing you "owe" us, your readers, is to take care of yourself and safeguard your health. Everything else will take care of itself.
Speedy recovery! Will be awaiting your return no matter what it looks like until you are 100%. Thank you for all you have imparted, it has helped so much, and then some.